Oily Rio Olympic Flag-Bearer Pita Taufatofua Qualifies for Pyeongchang Winter Olympics

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By now, we’ve all seen Pita Taufatofua, the beautiful hunk of man who became a viral internet sensation after his oily, bare-chested flag-waving strut during the 2016 Rio Olympic Opening Ceremony.

Pita recently shared a video on his Facebook, chronicling his success at qualifying for the Pyeongchang Winter Olympics in cross-country skiing. Qualifying for the Olympics is impressive enough; it’s even more so when you consider the fact that snow isn’t exactly a regular occurrence in Tonga!

He spoke with the Olympic Channel about the challenges that he’s faced in his quest to qualify, including the financial sacrifices that he’s had to make and the completely new situation in which he found himself, having to learn an entirely new sport in weather conditions to which he isn’t accustomed.

It’s a great Cinderella story, and Pita will no doubt find himself a huge fan base wanting to root for the underdog. Beyond that, it’s a marvelous reminder of what someone can achieve if they’ve got the desire, drive and dedication to achieve it.

Here’s hoping that we will see that level of dedication every time we see Pita at the Winter Olympics, especially considering that we won’t be seeing him oiled-up and shirtless there.

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Nominations for the 38th Razzie Awards are Here

Razzies Noms

Nominations for this year’s Golden Raspberry Awards (commonly known as the Razzies) have been released and while there are some majorly obvious and well-deserved (?) ones, a couple of them have surprised me.

Taking the lead this year, perhaps to no one’s surprise, is Transformers: The Last Knight. Now, admittedly, I haven’t watched Transformers since the second instalment because, well, I don’t hate myself. However, I’m not in the least bit shocked that it’s on this list. I mean, at this point, is there even really a proper story behind the explosions and CGI? The Razzie committee clearly doesn’t think so.

Another not-so-surprising nomination went to Johnny Depp for his reprisal of Captain Jack Sparrow in Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales.  The thing is, it isn’t that that Johnny Depp was particularly bad in the movie. It’s just such a tired and played-out role by now that very little enjoyment can be gained from it by the audience.

For me, the biggest surprise (and insult) was Jennifer Lawrence’s nomination for Worst Actress in mother! I know the movie sort of tanked with a lot of viewers but, personally, I feel that that was because it either went over their head, or touched a nerve with overly sensitive “Christians”. There were awful pacing problems throughout the film, but I don’t think Jennifer Lawrence was bad by any means. Javier Bardem, however… well, let’s just say I’m not contesting his nomination.

Sofia Boutella’s role in The Mummy also seems a bit unfair. I wouldn’t rush to give her an Academy Award nomination, but I don’t think she deserves a Razzie either. Same goes for Katherine Heigl in Unforgettable. Now, the movie itself was an abortion of a film, but she was no worse than anyone else in it. In fact, I personally think she was the only redeeming thing about my entire cinematic experience watching it.

Stray observation: how crappy must it feel to be nominated as worst actor in two separate movies in the same year? Looking at Mark Wahlberg and Javier Bardem.

Take a look at the nomination video below, and delight in the deliciously shady way in which Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales and Transformers: The Last Knight, which are both only the fifth movies in the franchises, are referred to as Pirates of the Caribbean XIII: Dead Careers Tell No Tales and Transformers XVII: The Last Knight.

Also, as wholeheartedly against Jennifer Lawrence’s nomination as I am, wouldn’t it be freaking amazing if she showed up a la Halle Berry or Sandra Bullock?!

show me the nominations, dammit!

Ansel Elgort’s Butt is a Supernova!

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You know, the real fault in those stars was that we never actually got to see Ansel Elgort’s peachy derrière sans jeans. Has no one noticed what a great butt he has or have I just been living under a rock?

Ansel Elgort, of The Fault in Our Stars and Baby Driver fame, recently released a music video for his single, “Supernova.” He’s been working in music for a while, and I’m actually pretty surprised he released it under his full name, as he’d previously had his acting name separate from his music persona, Ansolo.

Either way, he’s released the video for the moderately catchy song, the hook for which always seems to take ages to get out of my head whenever I listen to it. The song itself feels like an odd cross between trap and elements of indie rock, and is pretty dark, but impressive.

The main draw, however, is Ansel’s bum in the tight jeans he’s running around in. It is simultaneously ass-tounding and arousing.

Let’s Take a Moment to Appreciate Taron Egerton’s Sexiness

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Taron Egerton is one of those guys who always seems to toe the line between hot and adorable. In fact, I’m very often unsure as to which I think he is. One minute I’ll see him shirtless and think ‘what I’d give to get on that’ and the next minute I’ll see him singing forgotten lyrics in an interview and totally want to pinch his cheeks.

Probably best known from the Kingsman movies, he’s got a pretty versatile range of credits, including voice over in Illumination’s Sing. He’s also going to be starring in a dark adaptation of Robin Hood, which is produced by Leonardo DiCaprio, and slated for a September 2018 release. That, in itself, I’m sure is gonna give me plenty of blog fodder closer to the time of its release.

For now, though, let’s just appreciate Taron’s sexiness with some (NSFW) images because I can’t describe him any better than his Robin Hood co-star, Jamie Foxx, with the profound compliment: “that f***ing jawline. Good-looking motherf***er!”

Amen, Jamie. Amen.

show me the NSFW images, dammit!

Darren Criss bears his butt on American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace

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God bless Ryan Murphy! I mean, from that Finn Whitrock-Matt Bomer tighty-whitey showdown, then the Evan Peters/Colton Haynes sex scene to now Darren Criss in the nude, he’s basically become the fairy gayfather we’ve always wanted.

American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace premiered on Wednesday 17th January and it feels like this has been teased for the past 10 years. Between the thirst-trap photos of Darren Criss, and the condemnation of the veracity of the story by the Versace family, I feel like we’ve been hearing about this show for ages.

Anyway, the show finally premiered and they held back nothing in the premiere. Ricky Martin in a speedo, Edgar Ramírez getting flirty with other guys and Penélope Cruz in full-on Donatella Versace garb were just a few of the highlights. To be honest, though, I kinda blanked out a bit after seeing Darren Criss’ ass. At the risk of sounding like a gigantic pervert, this has been a fantasy of mine since Glee was on the air and I shipped Klaine harder than I have ever shipped or will ever ship any of my own relationships.

Side note: I’m really impressed with Penélope Cruz’s portrayal of Donatella Versace so far.

I may do an Unsolicited Review saga for this season of American Crime Story but for now, let’s just bask in the glory of Darren’s butt after the jump. NSFW, obvi.

show me Darren Criss’ ass, dammit!

Colton Haynes & Evan Peters Hook Up On American Horror Story: Cult

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Admittedly, it took me a while to get into this new season of American Horror Story. Usually, (as previous reviews have shown), I’m usually hooked by episode 2 or 3. For this season, however, I wasn’t so sure and I almost gave up on it because I just couldn’t see where the hell it was going.

But boy, am I glad I didn’t!

Ryan Murphy, for the past few seasons, has been upping the homoeroticism in this show but last night, this last episode completely skipped homoeroticism and jumped straight into homosexuality (emphasis on the sex).

A few episodes prior, a brief sex scene was shown between Colton Haynes and Billy Eichner, and it was hot despite its short-lived nature. But Christmas came super early last night when Colton Haynes was, this time, paired with Evan Peters in two separate homoerotic scenes.

I swear this isn’t the reason I’m now super into this season of AHS but, trust me, it has certainly helped.

Check out the very NSFW gifs after the jump
show me the homoerotic sexiness, dammit

Feel Good With Brooke Simpson’s ‘Stone Cold’ Voice Audition

With the constant barrage of shit we’re faced with on a daily, constantly reminded how much people suck, it’s always great when we get a little content that just makes us feel good. This video, more of a surprise to me than I can say, happens to be one of those. From beginning to end, everything about this video made me smile.

Contestant, Brooke Simpson, took to the stage of The Voice to belt out Demi Lovato’s power ballad, ‘Stone Cold.’ Now, anyone who has seen Demi rock that performance knows that it’s no easy feat, and you need serious chops to do it justice. However, Brooke proved that she was up to the task and she did an amazing job.

So, not only were the song choice and performance incredible, so was the reaction and subsequent banter of the judges. Now, despite American Idol’s quality decline in more recent years, and The Voice’s steady ratings hold, here’s something that most people seem not to want to admit: The Voice has not produced a fraction of the stars that American Idol has… if any at all. It’s great when a previously unknown contestant goes on to win the finale, but how many have actually gone on to achieve solid success after their win? I’ll wait…

Nevertheless, where The Voice has American Idol beat is the charisma, banter and connection of the celebrity judges and this is as evident as ever in this video. It’s so great to see this household-name judges put their hearts into singing the praises of these unknown contestants because they genuinely see their talent.

Seriously, watch this video and smile!

ps, from now on, I’m gonna start walking around with a little notepad just so that I can toss it at someone in incredulity.

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… because random is awesome!