American Idol alum, David Archuleta, has found himself the subject of some unflattering opinions after he tweeted comments made by Mormon Church superior, Boyd K. Packer
Romantic love is incomplete. It is a prelude. Love is nourished by the coming of children, who spring from the fountain of love…expressed between a man and a woman in marriage. #PresPacker.
Naturally, that went over about as well as a Miranda Lambert-singing, transgender, gay soldier at a Westboro Baptist
Cult Church protest, so David quickly issued an apology:
I apologize if I have offended anyone with the quote I sent out Saturday. I guess I didn’t think about the line “expressed between a man and a woman in marriage” being stressed when the whole quote didn’t fit in just 1 tweet. I am sorry my intentions were misunderstood, as my main focus was that too often romance is looked at as the end-all when there is so much more. The bonds that can be there within a family and raising kids, as that is the most valuable thing I have: my family. I do hope however, that whoever may have been offended may know I respect everyone’s freedom to believe and live as they choose. I hope others can respect what I value most in my life as well. Again, I’m sorry and please forgive me if I offended you. David
Now, this entire thing didn’t anger me nearly as much as it has evidently angered so many others. Maybe it’s because stupid comments like that don’t really surprise me anymore. Maybe it’s because I think that everyone is entitled to their opinion. Either way, I find the sentiments behind the comments more irritating than downright outrageous. That said, there are two specific aspects of the situation that truly piss me off:-
1. David’s apparent surprise that people could possibly misconstrue homophobia from those statements. I mean, let’s be real! David Archuleta is no longer the wide-eyed sixteen year old on Idol. He is a grown ass man, who should be blindingly aware of how big an issue LGBT rights currently are. Are we really supposed to believe that he’s so naive that the not-so-subtle homophobic subtext of that message was lost on him? Even worse, when he was called out on it, his apology was issued IF he offended anyone. People really need to stop phrasing “apologies” this way. Apologizing “if” you’ve offended someone is pretty much the equivalent of saying “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with what I said/did, but in the event that anyone is pissed off by it, I’ll say that I’m sorry in order to avoid an ugly situation”. And, if you ask me, that’s not really an apology at all. If we’re truly sorry, we shouldn’t apologize if we’ve offended someone, but apologize for offending them.
2. The fact that we are still, in this day and age, invalidating relationships that don’t have children! I think kids are great, and it’s always amazing when good people decide to have kids. However, it is so infuriating to me the way that people totally trivialize or dismiss childless relationships, pegging it as somehow lesser to relationships that have borne children. “Romantic love is incomplete. It is … nourished by the coming of children…” Seriously, what the fuck? This is such an insult to all those couples – homosexual or heterosexual – who either cannot have children or choose not to. Why is the love that they share not sufficient just because there are no kids in the mix? Not to mention all those couples who have experienced the tragedy of having conceived, only to lose the baby during the pregnancy. Statements like Packer’s do little more than say to these folks, “Nice try, but you still failed. Your love still isn’t sufficient.’ Ugh! Meanwhile, there are a shit ton of loveless marriages existing in society where the couples only stay together because they feel
resigned bound to their children. We also know of those where pregnancies are secretly forced in order to manipulate one of the partners into staying with the other. Where’s the “complete love” in that?
Hmm, now that I think about it, maybe some people aren’t entitled to an opinion, after all!
Pic via David Archuleta