Tag Archives: american horror story

Colton Haynes & Evan Peters Hook Up On American Horror Story: Cult

Colton-Haynes-Evan-Peters-Sex-3

Admittedly, it took me a while to get into this new season of American Horror Story. Usually, (as previous reviews have shown), I’m usually hooked by episode 2 or 3. For this season, however, I wasn’t so sure and I almost gave up on it because I just couldn’t see where the hell it was going.

But boy, am I glad I didn’t!

Ryan Murphy, for the past few seasons, has been upping the homoeroticism in this show but last night, this last episode completely skipped homoeroticism and jumped straight into homosexuality (emphasis on the sex).

A few episodes prior, a brief sex scene was shown between Colton Haynes and Billy Eichner, and it was hot despite its short-lived nature. But Christmas came super early last night when Colton Haynes was, this time, paired with Evan Peters in two separate homoerotic scenes.

I swear this isn’t the reason I’m now super into this season of AHS but, trust me, it has certainly helped.

Check out the very NSFW gifs after the jump
show me the homoerotic sexiness, dammit

American Horror Story Freak Show Episode 11 “Magical Thinking”: My Unsolicited Review

AHS-Elsa-WTF-Face

WARNING: CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS. 

Allow me to preface this review by pointing out that Matt Bomer guest starred in one episode of AHS and stripped down to his undies. Now, Neil Patrick Harris is here and he bares his butt for the camera. If this is the effect Ryan Murphy has on out gay actors who guest star on AHS, may I please nominate Luke Evans and Ricky Martin for future episodes? Ok, on to the recap!

On the previous episode of AHS, Jimmy had been arrested for one of Dandy’s murder sprees, and we learned that his lobster hands had been amputated by Stanley. This episode picked right up from there. Inducing sickness in Jimmy with some sort of non-fatal poison, Stanley managed to hijack Jimmy from prison and, although he assures Jimmy that only one of his hands would be needed to afford “a good lawyer”, Jimmy wakes up in hospital to find both his arms ending in bloody, bandaged stumps.

The relationship between Jimmy and Dell progresses, and seems to even reach an all-time high, with Dell confiding in Jimmy about his painful childhood as a freak among freaks, while he spoon-feeds Jimmy his dinner. When Jimmy is about to be transported back to prison, Dell – on Elsa’s orders – goes to rescue him together with Amazon Eve, and he kills two police officers in the process, though he, himself, sustains a bullet wound.

The main attraction of this episode was, undoubtedly, Chester (Neil Patrick Harris), who is a travelling salesman/magic aficionado who quickly becomes the object of desire of the twins (who, by the way, are on a relentless mission to lose their virginity). Neil Patrick Harris delivered an awesome – if incredibly creepy – performance as Chester and, at this point, I’m torn between feeling sorry for him, and being wary of him. Though he has the ability to be extremely charming, the guy is a definite psycho, and has an unnatural obsession with his puppet, Marjorie (voiced and played by Jamie Brewer, which was all kinds of HELL YEAH AWESOME!), who somehow appears as a real, living girl to his twisted, deranged eyes. Add this to the fact that Elsa decides to sell him the freakshow, and we’ve got a delicious recipe for disaster!

Show me the rest of the review and possible NSFW GIFs, dammit!

My American Horror Story Viewing Experience

AHS-Dandy-Bored

Can a show be bipolar? Seriously, this season of American Horror Story has me genuinely pondering this question. Since the beginning of Freak Show, I’ve sort of been on a see-saw of interest. One week’s episode will leave me pumped to see what happens next, and the next episode just leaves me feeling kinda meh. You may have noticed that I’ve stopped reviewing the show for a few weeks now, because it had just gotten exhausting trying to keep up. Perhaps this has nothing to do with the show at all, and is entirely my fault. I won’t deny that my expectations before the season started were so high that the good God above, himself, could have probably seen it from his porch. And it isn’t like I’m not enjoying the show. I just feel that the show is a bit all over the place – like I’d predicted from episode one – and it’s still sort of hard to establish a primary plot. The show still, however, has many redeeming points and I’d like to keep putting up some of the more GIF-worthy moments. So, this week, I’m going to focus less on a specific episode and instead mention a few points that I really enjoy.

  1. DANDY!! Since AHS’ inception, my favourite characters have been played by Jessica Lange… especially so in the second and third seasons. In Freak Show, however, this title has absolutely shifted to Dandy, the callous, unfeeling sociopath in sharp clothes. Finn Wittrock, I believe, is doing a fantastic job in portraying the Patrick Bateman-esque serial killer with killer serial charm. Dandy is one of those characters whom I love enough to want to see more of every single week, yet hate enough to already be anticipating his demise – and that’s quite a feat to pull off.
  2. The overall acting. Despite my judgement of the quality of the plot – at least thus far – the acting on the show has remained (for the most part) in line with what we’ve come to expect from AHS. The primary exception, in my opinion, has been Gabourey Sidibe, who usually dominates whichever role that she’s given. Somehow, though, her Regina character was not great, and I unfortunately wasn’t terribly aggrieved to see her go.
  3. The vast amounts of male nudity and gay subplots. Now, I understand that this particular situation may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but it’s a goddamn Lipton party for me! If awareness is supposed to increase tolerance, then Ryan Murphy seems to be doing his darnedest to have a homophobia-free world by the end of Freak Show. Granted, there are some gay scenes which are less than savoury (Matt Bomer’s murder, Denis O’Hare’s stroking of his “freak” penis) but the show can otherwise keep them coming! Let me just take this moment to point out how adorable I think Stanley’s prostitute lover (played by Michael Murray) is. His “But I like puppies” line just about killed me.

We’ve still got a few more episodes to go before the season ends, so there’s no doubt time for some great developments. Whatever those may be, they’d just better make up for killing off Frances Conroy!

Show me the (NSFW) GIFs, dammit!

American Horror Story Freak Show Episode 5 “Pink Cupcakes”: My Unsolicited Review

AHS-Dandy-Sad-Happy-Moody-Faces

Warning: Contains major spoilers. Obviously.

Finally! The American Horror Story that we’re accustomed to is back! This is truly the first episode all season that has excited me in such a way that I can’t wait to see what happens next! When Twisty was killed off, I wasn’t sure what that would mean for the show, since he really was the “horror” in this season’s horror story. However, I think the writers struck gold with Dandy as a serial murderer and he is a very amazing villain! This week’s episode also teased a future with several of our beloved freaks murdered by Stanley and Maggie “Esmerelda”, and put on display in the Human Oddities Museum. Since none of these murders occurred in this episode, I’m really intrigued to see it unfold.

This week, we see Stanley persist in his deception of Elsa, attempting to persuade her that having a television show (on Warner Bros., no less) would be the best career move for her, as television is the future of entertainment. Ah, what it must have been like in the fifties, unaware of the power of television. Can you imagine a time when your life wasn’t controlled by that magic talking box? The thought is almost terrifying in its liberation, isn’t it? Anyway, Elsa flat-out refused, insisting that television was too gauche for a woman of her talents. Disappointed, but undeterred, Stanley leaves her tent, claiming that he was looking forward to seeing and enjoying her act. He, it turned out, was the only one, as Elsa’s act (another goddamn rendition of “Life on Mars”) was booed and catcalled into oblivion, making it a bigger disaster than the live performance of Milli Vanilli Ashlee Simpson Cassie any failed musical act in recorded history. A thoroughly humiliated and destroyed Elsa later calls Stanley in to accept his television offer.

Before Elsa’s catastrophic “performance”, more was happening with the other freaks. Esmerelda has clearly taken a liking to Jimmy, offering to read his palm while he practised his act. Her “reading” warned him of a smooth-talking newcomer whom Jimmy should avoid at all costs… even if it meant having to leave the freakshow that very night. At Jimmy’s reluctance at the suggestion, she tries to convince him that he is smart and good-looking enough to be able to do anything that he wanted. However, when he tried to go in for a kiss from her, she pulled back, indicating that despite whatever chemistry the two of them may have, there are still limitations to romance when physical appearance is concerned.

Show me the rest of the review and the GIFs, dammit!

American Horror Story Freak Show Episode 3 & 4 “Edward Mordrake”: My Unsolicited Review

AHS-Madison-Surprise-Bitch

Note: This has been here for days now. I was entirely convinced that I’d published it, but since I’m a complete moron, that wasn’t the case.

I know that I haven’t posted in what feels like for-effing-ever, but if it’s any consolation at all, I feel incredibly badly about it. Let’s just chalk it up to me sucking, life sucking and then take it from there. Due to this aforementioned sucking (I’m really not liking the way this sounds), I wasn’t able to review last week’s episode of American Horror Story. But, since the Universe is a magical place where things sometimes tend to work in our favour, last week and this week’s episodes were continuations of each other, so I’m just going to combine them into one review.

From the first couple of episodes, I’d made it clear that, although I was enjoying the show’s return to it’s dark and spooky roots, I wasn’t exactly sure where it was heading (in terms of plot and characters). At the end of “Edward Mordrake Part 1”, I was left in more confusion than ever – seriously, I literally went, “WTF did I just watch.” However, after part 2, I think there’s a little bit more clarity and development in the show.

Let’s begin with the most WTF-worthy aspect of the episodes: Edward Mordrake. Edward Mordrake was handsome, charming and educated nobleman who seemed to have everything that he could desire. However, unbeknownst to most, he’d been born with a hideous face at the back of his head, which allegedly whispered dark and terrible things that only Edward could hear. Despite many attempts at killing his horrific second face, it remained, and it drove him mad. Though he was eventually sent to an insane asylum, he broke free and joined a freak show. During a performance on Halloween night, Mordrake killed all the freaks and then hung himself. The carnie legend is that if freaks perform on Halloween night, the ghost of Edward Mordrake is summoned and one of the freaks is killed.

Show me the rest of the review and the GIFs, dammit!

American Horror Story Season 4 Episode 2 “Massacres and Matinees”: My Unsolicited Review

AHS-Clown-Face-Mouth

American Horror Story is definitely trying to rev up the creepiness and frightening factor this season and, so far though I still have no idea where the story is going, I do think they’re succeeding.

This week’s episode managed to continue from last week’s without any major new developments. After Jimmy’s murder of the police officer, more cops showed up at the freak show, looking for evidence.

Twisty the clown is continuing his almost random string of murders. Although, I suppose it may not be that random, considering his latest victim was a toy store owner, and he subsequently brought one of the toys for his hostage “son.” One of the biggest developments with his story is that he seems to have gotten a new and overly enthusiastic companion in the form of Dandy Mott, who was earlier turned away by Jimmy when Dandy expressed his interest in being a part of the freak show. Dandy, up til this point, has been showcased as nothing more than a bored, spoiled immature man-child. But, now, we are beginning to see a far more sinister side to him. It began when the Motts’ housekeeper/cook, Nora (Patti Labelle), pointed out to Mrs Motts that the fur and teeth from the animals that Dandy had been torturing and dismembering may bring unwanted attention from neighbours, who may think that he has something to do with the recent murders. However, despite Mrs Motts crying that Dandy is simply bored, his later alliance with Twisty the clown proves completely otherwise. When she is finally able to dislodge a sturdy piece of wood from their cage, Twisty’s captured “wife” almost guaranteed their freedom with a not-so-solid-but-good-enough blow to his head. She and the little boy both flee, but their escape is hindered when Dandy shows up and brings them right back to Twisty. I know that it’s illogical to hate a fictional character, but the harm that I would have done to this guy had he been real!

The freak show saw an addition of two new members: Desiree Dupree (Angela Bassett), a three-breasted hermaphrodite, and her husband, Dell Toledo (Michael Chiklis), a man of uncanny strength. Being a freak must be a hereditary attribute, because we soon learn that Dell is actually the errant father of Jimmy, chased away when he once tried to kill Jimmy as an infant for being a loud freak of nature. It’s like the Twilight Zone version of the X-Men. Despite being a newbie, and an employee of Elsa, Dell soon asserts himself as the head of the freak show carnival, implementing rules and policies independently of Elsa. He’s also got a wicked temper, as evidenced when he beat Jimmy to a pulp for trying to get the other freaks out in public. A plan later devised by Jimmy and Elsa to plant the badge of the police officer whom Jimmy murdered in Dell’s caravan so that the police may find it and take the brute away fails miserably when Dell witnesses Jimmy going into his trailer, and puts the badge in Meep’s room instead. I mean, come on! For someone who’s supposedly spent his entire life hiding his freakish lobster hands so that others won’t see it, Jimmy is really an idiot if he doesn’t know that the cardinal rule of sneaking into anywhere is to that you first look around to ensure that no one sees you. UGH!

Meep’s detainment in prison leads to the rest of the inmates ganging up on and consequently killing him. His lifeless body is then returned to the camp and dumped at Jimmy’s feet. From this moment, we can tell that an indelible line has been drawn and an impending war is inevitable.

Show me the GIFs, dammit!

American Horror Story: Freak Show Episode 1 “Monster’s Among Us”: My Unsolicited Review

AHS-Don't-Call-Us-Freaks

It took so long before I was actually able to get around posting this that I wondered if I should even bother. In the end, I decided for it, but I’m definitely going to make a better effort to post these earlier from next week.

It feels like we’ve been waiting ages for the return of American Horror Story, but our wait is finally and thankfully over. The Ryan Murphy-produced hit FX show returned for its fourth season, entitled Freak Show, and the show was indeed rife with freakiness.

Freak Show revolves mainly around a 1950’s carnival which specialises in “freaks”, human oddities and abnormalities from around the world. Lacklustre interest in the show, coupled with mounting appreciation for television has made ticket sales for the freak attraction dwindle to near-nothingness, though its ringleader, Elsa Mars (Jessica Lange) has far from given up hope for its next big break and ultimate revival. Her wish seems to have been granted by her discovery of conjoined twins Bette and Dot Tattler (Sarah Paulson), who join the show after being wanted by law enforcement for the murder of their mother, who’d kept them hidden all their life for fear of them being ridiculed, hurt or killed. Though the twins share the same body, their minds and personalities could not be more different. While Bette is beyond thrilled at the opportunity to finally be free from her life of obscurity, Dot only reluctantly joins Elsa’s circus because she understands that she is left with no alternative.

The pilot episode was mostly an introduction of the characters and future plot, but already we can see that this season promises to bring the terror and suspense in a way that we haven’t seen since season one’s, Murder House. The complete mystery surrounding some half-faceless murderous clown invokes a creepiness that the past few seasons of AHS has failed to delay. I mean, clowns already are super creepy, but this one ups the ante by several mortifying degrees. Initially, I thought that he was one of the members of the freak show, but it soon became clear that he wasn’t, and so his story is still very much unclear. What we do know is that he’s murdered several people mercilessly, except for a young woman and a small boy. Now, I’m no psychologist or anything, but allow me to interject some two-cent psychology theory here: we’ve got a hideous, mutilated person who clearly has no qualms about killing someone in cold blood, yet decides to spare the lives of a beautiful young woman and child, holding them hostage. I’m already putting it out there that this murderous clown is just misunderstood and looking for love, although he knows that no one will love him with his appearance, so he resorts to kidnapping his ideal wife and son in an attempt to recreate a farce of the family that he’d either always wanted or once had and then lost. If that’s the case, I just might barf all over Ryan Murphy’s legacy, but I admit that I am incredibly intrigued to learn of the circumstances which led to the way he now looks.

Another factor which makes me happy is the fact that most of our beloved characters have returned for this season (woot for Jessica Lange, Sarah Paulson, Evan Peters and Frances Conroy). Next episode’s promo also promises Dennis O’Hare and Emma Roberts (in the most atrocious and WTF-inducing brown wig since Anna Camp’s Sarah Newlin character from last season’s True Blood). I’m really hoping that we at least get a few recurring cameos from Lily Rabe and Taissa Farmiga, but so far there’s been no indication of this.

My one preoccupation for this season of AHS is the fact that, although the central storyline seems promising in terms of horror, there seem to be very many divergent plots which, at best may prove to be incongruent, and at worse may be a huge mess, which is exactly what happened in last season’s, Coven. There were very many plot lines which started out incredibly exciting, only to see them go nowhere, really. It was almost as if there was one particular story line set written for Coven, and then halfway through, the writers decided to change course, and many things just fell by the wayside. For instance, we were initially shown Zoe to be this up and coming new witch, and her epic defeat of the voodoo-animated zombies on Halloween prompted a “whoever she is, she’s powerful” kind of vibe from Marie Laveau, only to have this storyline all but snuffed. There was also great promise in Patti Lupone’s character, after we learned that she’d murdered her husband, only to pretty much have her disappear inconsequentially. In Freak Show, there seem to be very many plot lines that may soon compete for centre stage: the central story of the freak show finally gaining an audience, Elsa’s rivalry with the twins (which we saw from next week’s preview), Jimmy’s (Evan Peters) desire to leave the carnival, the murder of a police officer and the ensuing legal battle, the rebellion of the freaks against all those who persecute them, the clown, Frances Conroy’s impending clash with the freak show, Emma Roberts and Dennis O’Hare’s involvement with and lies to the freaks, and the realisation that Elsa is also a “freak” (which she really isn’t, as it only appears that she lost her legs, probably from the war). Mind you – these are only those that I’ve noticed from the first episode, so…

Here’s hoping, though, that this season lives up to the very high expectations that the fans are (perhaps unfairly) plying onto it.

Show me the GIF’s, dammit!